By Great White Snark | May 14, 2007
Last week I participated in ProBlogger’s Top 5 Group Writing Project. Why? ‘Cause I’m a sucker for free link-love, that’s why. My Technorati rank has skyrocketed to 110,414, which is the equivalent status of the scummy, encrusted, metaphorical bottom-of-the-barrel. But at least now I’m in the barrel!
The stipulation of participating (and getting mad-links from ProBlogger’s home page) was that I link to other entries that “resonated” with me. Fair enough.
Here are the Top 5 lists that got my attention, either for being right-on, so close, or dead wrong.
(Before you give me grief for capitalization inconsistencies, you Type As, know that I am quoting the titles directly from the entries.)
Top 5 Drunk Celebrities Caught on Video You know what’s sad? It’s hard to decide which is a bigger trainwreck of hilarity: Hasselhoff’s drunk video, or the video for his song, Jump In My Car.
Top 5 Ways To Improve Your Rock Climbing Skills Rock climbing just makes me feel good, the way coming home at 2am on a Saturday night and finding Die Hard playing on HBO feels good. Aaaah.
Top 5 Reasons to Marry a Geek The overly-elaborate home theater. Talk about resonating with me…
5 Reasons Why Stand-Up Comics Make Better Copywriters When you’re right, you’re right.
How To be More Sexy – Latina Style I’m certainly a fan of the Latina qualities that you’ve listed here, but I’m afraid I don’t see “Slammin’ Badonkadonk” among them.
Five TV Shows on the Bubble That Should Be Saved Veronica Mars. Jericho. How I Met Your Mother. Some of the most fun I have yelling at the TV is during these shows. And I hear Friday Night Lights is solid, too, I just don’t have any more room on my TV plate for it. You were almost a “right-on” with this entry, if it weren’t for What About Brian? Dude, what about Brian.
Five Favorite Comic Strip Characters The only correct answers is “Calvin & Hobbes”, so way to get one out of five right, champ. How dare you lump “Krazy” and “Buddy” (who?) in with everyone’s favorite stuffed tiger. How dare you, sir.
Top five things that guys really want Good effort, but let me help: Sex, BJs, illicit handies in public places, HDTV, and alone-time. (So we agree on alone-time. Cheers.)
My Top 5 Most Important Comics Sorry, The Dark Tower is not important. It’s exciting, especially if you enjoy Stephen King, but without all the annoying reading. The rest of your list is passable.
Top five video games that should be turned into movies Did you ever see Doom? Dungeons & Dragons? Bloodrayne? Street Fighter? Beginning to see a pattern, here? Your post was flawed from the moment you wrote the title.
Top 5 Things to Avoid Saying to a Lady You think that “Don’t you trust me?” is worse than, “Wow, in this light, I just now noticed your moustache. Do you ever wax it?” or “Yikes, what’s that smell? Close your legs.”* Clearly you don’t know women.
The top 5 lessons I learned at Kindermusik Yak. This reminds me of those “Everything I need to know, I learned from my teddy bear” posters that you find in the college dorm rooms of powerfully dorky freshman girls. Don’t ask me why I know what’s in the bedrooms of dorky college girls.
Top 5 Emerging Blogs Not included: Great White Snark. Your list has been judged… and found wanting. Repent.
* When I was about 13, I used that line… “Ugh, what’s that smell… close your legs!” …on my stepmother. It was such a horrific thing to say that I managed to pass into that mystical land where I avoided punishment because my parents were way too mind-blown to begin to know what to do to me.