≡ Menu

The Top Five Celebrities That Zombies Would Avoid Eating

Contrary to popular opinion, zombies aren’t omnivores when it comes to eating human flesh. They won’t put just any old man meat in their mouths.

Leave that to Britney Spears.


5) Keith Richards

Zombies consider it bad form to turn on one of their own. They’re not cannibals, for goodness sake.

Plus, they prefer their meat fresh and organic, not rotten and treated by chemicals.

4) Ken Davitian (a.k.a. That Guy From Borat)

Have you ever tried eating a buffalo steak with the buffalo fur still on it? No? Well, take it from me: it really detracts from the enjoyment of the dining experience.

3) Pamela Anderson

If you’ve ever accidentally tried to take a bite out of decorative, plastic fruit, you’ll understand why Pam isn’t that appealing to the undead palate.

Hepatitis C, on the other hand, is a delicacy among zombie gourmets. Like an exotic, spicy mixer in a human-blood cocktail.

2) Paris Hilton

As we all know, zombies like them some brains. So… you see the problem.

1) Rosie O’Donnell

Three words: Mad Cow Disease.

Enjoy this post? Also check out The Top Five Celebrities Most Likely to be Mistaken for Zombies.

7 comments… add one
  • Karen January 18, 2008, 7:12 am

    Yer killing me with the Mad Cow Disease! What a perfect caption for possibly the worst picture she has ever had taken. Nicely done GWS!

  • nickolai January 18, 2008, 10:10 am

    Nice, thoughtful selections GWS. Though I think you give zombies too much credit for #4, Ken Davitian. That boy looks to offer some good eats! Hair or no hair.

  • Scott January 19, 2008, 12:43 am

    Oh my – I’m not sure which of those photos was most disturbing. I think I’m going to have nightmares now.


  • BaseGuardian January 19, 2008, 1:42 am

    Ayeyeyeyeye. Didn’t know zombies was too picky for food :) Well, at least I’m safe…or not….

  • tom January 22, 2008, 7:37 pm

    This is very disturbing!

    I keep clicking on the Pam Anderson pic and it won’t enlarge!

  • Great White Snark January 22, 2008, 7:46 pm

    Isn’t there already enough enlargement going on there for you, Tom?

  • Bradley February 1, 2008, 8:52 pm

    LOL, Rosie sooo is a zombie.. looks like shes already eaten 5 people!

    Zombie games –> http://www.online-zombie-games.com

Leave a Comment