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The Top Five Awful Death Star Cakes – Geeky Cake of the Week

By Great White Snark | April 8, 2008

Let me be clear: I am talentless in the kitchen. If it weren’t for my George Foreman grill, I’d live off of protein bars and frozen microwavable pasta. In the evolution of culinary arts, I’m the hunched-over caveman of cooking.

Yet, in no way does that fact diminish my enthusiasm for disparaging the efforts of those well-intentioned people whose cake-making skills–while plainly on par with those of a dull-witted chimp–far surpass my own. My gall knows no bounds.


Source: Lamascus

I mean, I’ve seen worse likenesses. And if I couldn’t figure out what I was looking at, you conveniently spelled it out for me there in that serial killer’s scrawl of yours.

So, it’s not that bad. Did you really have to put it on your front stoop as a doormat?


Source: terryattops

“Thanks, Mom! It’s just what I wanted! A manhole cover made of plumber’s putty! D-e-e-e-e-licious!”


Source: trinlayk

Is it just me, or is this cake suddenly more impressive if you pretend it’s supposed to be a view of R2-D2’s face through a keyhole?


Source: Zelda139

Everything was going fine in the construction of the Death Star until a giant space squid came along and took an inconveniently-situated dump.


Source: jessicarabbit1313

Can’t… find… the words…

Did you even look at a picture of the Death Star when you made this, or just play a few games of Tic-Tac-Toe with the frosting and call it a day?

And what kind of shape is that? There’s nothing imposing or imperial about a muffin-top-shaped Death Star.

And could you have found a less-appetizing shade of frosting? What is that? Pewter?

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  • Topics: Cakes, Star Wars | 11 Comments »

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    11 Responses to “The Top Five Awful Death Star Cakes – Geeky Cake of the Week”

    1. Wavatar Matt Says:
      April 9th, 2008 at 5:43 am

      Is that last one supposed to be the Death Star or the training droid? It would make sense if it were that since it’s with a lightsaber. I mean, it still doesn’t look like one, but it would be justifiable if it were.

    2. Wavatar nickolai Says:
      April 9th, 2008 at 8:27 am

      Nice exposé on the underbelly of D.S. cakery. But I’m curious to see how a GWS-crafted Death Star cake would compare with this rogues gallery.

      Yes, consider your virtual face slapped by my lacey ninny-gloves!

    3. Wavatar Shithead Says:
      April 9th, 2008 at 9:48 am

      I had my share of awkward years, so I’d rather not comment on this, but I can’t help but post it… the birthday girl with cake #3 will only add to your enjoyment of this fantastic post.

    4. Wavatar Great White Snark Says:
      April 9th, 2008 at 10:55 am

      @Matt: Yep, sadly, it’s supposed to be the Death Star. You’re right… the whole thing would have been 17% less embarrassing for the creator if they had just called it a training droid.

      @nickolai: I think I made it clear that my own compelling lack of talent in no way hinders my urge or ability to deprecate others.

    5. Wavatar nickolai Says:
      April 10th, 2008 at 9:08 am

      Well sure, but lack of talent never held anyone else back — look at the cakes you surfaced.

      On another note: I can’t think of a less-appetizing SW icon to model a cake after than the Death Star…what flavor are these cakes anyway? Grey?

    6. Wavatar Great White Snark Says:
      April 10th, 2008 at 11:00 am

      @nickolai: Flavor = metal.

    7. Wavatar Cindi Says:
      April 10th, 2008 at 9:56 pm

      What scares me is how they arrived at this particular shade of “pewter.”

    8. Wavatar trin Says:
      July 8th, 2008 at 8:07 am

      It’s OK that you think the cake is funny (I’m the photographer for #3), it was MEANT to be funny, and the kids LOVED it. (Oh the cake inside was even grey! and it was delish.)

      However, please note that there is an implied copyright on EVERY photo or work of art from the time it’s created. So it’s just good manners to ASK before using someone else’s photo. YES, even if posted on the net, or if it’s just some “family photo” and you aren’t using to make money.

      If someone has gotten a registered copyright, they could theoretically sue the socks of you for using their photo in your blog.

    9. Wavatar Death Star Cake with Tower of Mind-Blowing Star Wars Cupcakes - Geeky Curiosity of the Week » Great White Snark Says:
      July 9th, 2008 at 1:16 am

      […] we’ve seen our share of bad Death Star cakes. I’m so jaded that I profiled an artsy Death Star wedding cake that didn’t even have […]

    10. Wavatar Assorted Cakes | bathgatesdotnet Says:
      July 26th, 2008 at 8:11 pm

      […] The Top Five Awful Death Star Cakes and an excellent James Bond cake from Cake Wrecks. […]

    11. Wavatar Bionelly Says:
      August 29th, 2008 at 11:52 pm

      Is it just me, or does #2 look a lot more like a dirty igloo (being attacked by a squid) than the Death Star?