≡ Menu

This Carving of Sideshow Bob from the Simpsons Makes a Single Turnip a Little Less Useless

Much like George Lucas’s penchant for writing screen plays, the Beverly Hills Cop franchise, and the biological conception of any of those jacktards on The Hills… turnips probably started out as a reasonably good idea, but at some point took a hard left turn at “no longer retaining any merit.”  Except as a punchline on The Office.

Then the tides of of turnip utility changed (briefly) when the minds behind the Only Knives blog let loose upon pair of jicamas (i.e., “Mexican turnips,” don’tcha know) to carve Sideshow Bob from The Simpsons with a Kershaw Ken Onion Leek Folding Knife.

Although I suppose any ol’ knife of the sharp-and-pointy variety would have done just as nicely.

The hardest part of making Bob is keeping the hair from falling apart.

Really?  I thought the most difficult part would be spending so much time in intimate contact with such an insultingly-useless vegetable.

Enjoy this post? Subscribe to Great White Snark by or by RSS.

5 comments… add one
  • V December 12, 2008, 11:31 am

    jicamas may be called the mexican turnip but they are far from a turnip – they taste more like a cross between an apple and a raw potato, with a sweetness in there that no turnip could produce. All in all they are delicious, unlike the disgusting turnip. Point being – there is still no real use for the turnip. Give the jicama some exposure.

  • Great White Snark December 12, 2008, 11:34 am

    Take your enlightened views back to the commune, hippie, because they all look alike to me.

    Yeah. That’s right. I said it.

    P.S. Thanks for insights. But obviously I’m much more comfortable in my ignorance.

  • Nathan D December 12, 2008, 3:44 pm

    I think an A/B taste-test is in order. You have besmirched a reasonably delectable and certainly crunchy salad-enhancing treat just to get a funny word into your punchline. If you’re going to insult a root, you gotta give it a taste first, me thinks.

  • Great White Snark December 12, 2008, 3:58 pm

    Did I mention the turnip can just go ahead and suck it?

  • Nathan D December 12, 2008, 4:11 pm

    I was defending the jicama, not the turnip. Oh, I see — they all look the same to you.

Leave a Comment