By Great White Snark | August 3, 2010
Green Lantern cosplay: Just because hunkalorian* Ryan Reynolds makes it look easy doesn’t mean the remainder of our population can pull it off. Not when there’s spandex involved.
No, seriously. You’ve been warned. Tremendous abuse of spandex lies ahead.
* He who is well-versed in the language of hunkage. (Don’t look at me like that. I’m not hot for Ryan Reynolds or anything. I’m just giving you facts. Which came straight from [my interpretation of pretty pictures on] reputable internets web sites.)
5) Over-Accessorized Green Lantern Costume
No, Green Lantern doesn’t have a cape. Or a bo staff. Or body armor. Or parachute pants.
But I like your… enthusiasm, fella. Maybe next time you don’t try to recreate the Green Lantern costume from memory?
4) The A-Bit-Too-Tight Green Lantern Costume
Special delivery! Who’d like to sign for this package?
3) The “Special Weapons” Green Lantern Costumes
I’m pretty sure Green Lantern doesn’t brandish throwing stars. And if I recall correctly, he turned in his Colossal Bosoms of Doom back in issue #124.
2) The Laziest Green Lantern Costume
So you spent eleven minutes making a Green Lantern belt out of felt and turned a discarded bed sheet into a cape.
And this is a “costume” in your mind? I’ve had a mildly-clever, three-year-old t-shirt impress more people at Comic-Con. And I was wearing it inside-out.
1) The “Worst Abuse of Spandex” Green Lantern Costume
Well, the color is a bit off, and I don’t recognize that Green Lantern symbol, but the HOLY CRAP IT’S TRYING TO GET OUT SOMEONE GET A TASER FAST TOO LATE IT’S ALMOST FREE RUUUUUUUN.
BONUS WRONGNESS: Victorian Green Lantern Cosplay
Ok, so this isn’t so much “poorly executed” as it is “poorly received.” By me.
You say “Victorian,” I say, “weird Renaissance Faire vibe.”