Zombies
« Previous EntriesThe Five Step Zombie Guide to Going Green
Friday, August 15th, 2008Everyone should do their part to protect our environment and planet right now so that future generations of… whatever… don’t have to pay the price.
Meatbag compost pile.
5) Compost your leftovers.
Don’t leave a gutted carcass where one of your shuffling, undead brethren can trip over it. Compost it!
If we don’t keep this mudball tidy, who [...]
Another Five Celebrities Likely to be Mistaken for Zombies
Friday, May 2nd, 2008Most advice is like Paris Hilton. No one wants to hear it unless it means getting one step closer to getting laid.
Fortunately for you, my advice is like Exxon-Mobil: unabashedly and unnaturally rich. (And often at the expense of helpless consumers.)
Example: In the midst of a plague of the undead, don’t start swinging [...]
How Five Presidential Candidates Would Handle a Looming Zombie Threat
Friday, April 25th, 2008Thus far, the presidential candidates (and one ex-candidate) haven’t been particularly forthcoming with their platforms on the whole zombie issue. So what are we discerning voters to do?
Here’s an idea: how about we directly equate the candidates’ quoted positions on Iran to their unspoken positions on the zombie threat.
I mean, that’s a fair and [...]
Zombie Fingers Halloween Cake - Geeky Cake of the Week
Tuesday, March 25th, 2008Personally, when I look at a simple-yet-elegant Grand Marnier flourless chocolate truffle cake, I don’t usually think, “Hey, you know what this pristine layer of liqueur-flavored frosting needs? Some rotting fingers sticking out of it.”
Thankfully, Canadian artisan Candy doesn’t suffer from my hobbling lack of vision.
Candy created this piece “for a casual gathering” before [...]
The Top Five Best Science Fiction Apocalypses
Friday, February 8th, 2008In honor of last week’s fantastic final issue of the now-classic Y The Last Man.
No, this list doesn’t include the global-warming-inspired ‘apocalypse by ice age’ (a la The Day After Tomorrow), because I’m already giving writer/direct Roland Emmerich credit for Independence Day, and any credit is practically too much credit for that dude.
5) ALIEN TAKEOVER
As [...]
The Top Five Celebrities That Zombies Would Avoid Eating
Friday, January 18th, 2008Contrary to popular opinion, zombies aren’t omnivores when it comes to eating human flesh. They won’t put just any old man meat in their mouths.
Leave that to Britney Spears.
Baddum-bum!
5) Keith Richards
Zombies consider it bad form to turn on one of their own. They’re not cannibals, for goodness sake.
Plus, they prefer their meat fresh [...]




