“Sure,” you said. “Sure, the International Space Station looks like a Tie Fighter if you squint real hard and look at it from a distance. But that’s just a coincidence.”

Sure it is, you rube.

Now that astronauts have added the last major component to the International Space Station, including a cupola that looks just like a Tie Fighter’s cockpit window, there can no longer be any question.

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This Cobra Jungle Viper* figure is among the G.I. Joe 3 3/4″ figures announced at Toy Fair 2010, which is visiting New York City this week to highlight all the latest Chinese-made lead-based products for children.

Obviously, neither practicality nor stealth is priority #1 in the Cobra’s version of jungle warfare. Otherwise, the Commander wouldn’t be saddling his soldiers with small, ramshackle huts made of artificial palm fronds as they’re trying to make their way through the thick undergrowth.

If this is Cobra’s idea of jungle camouflage, I think I’m beginning to understand how those G.I. Joe meat heads always manage to win.

* Did you perhaps think it was a lame reboot of Spider-Man’s nemesis, The Vulture?

Find custom G.I. Joe figures on Ebay

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The 1979 made-for-TV movie Captain America II: Death Too Soon is what happens at the confluence of late-1970s-style TV schlock, a devastating lack of respect for the comic book source material, and a precipitous drop in the standards of famed English actor Sir Christopher Lee.

From the description on YouTube:

…starring Reb Brown. The character differs significantly from the comics, in both his origin and his operations. For instance, Rogers is a character in contemporary times whose father was a 1940s government agent. The very patriotic attitude of Steve’s father earned him the nickname Captain America. Rogers, an artist, was inspired by this story to sketch a superhero. After an accident he received an experimental chemical called the FLAG (Full Latent Ability Gain) formula (at one point referred to as a “super-steroid”) which enhances his body with heightened strength and reflexes, and a costume based on his drawing.

Yikes. That’s taking liberties with the source material, and then leaving it in a crack house for three days to see what emerges.

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Hey, have you been following the Olympics? Yeah?

Well, you should follow my Twitter profile or the GWS Facebook Page if following comes so easy to you. Guh.

• $85 Star Trek skirt. $5 for the material, $80 for a giant picture of Shatner across your lower body. http://bit.ly/ccXbL0
• Devastatingly fantastic hack. This would make years of learning electrical engineering worthwhile. http://bit.ly/9NpDpb
• And notice how you’ve never seen the Fortress of Solitude and Lady Gaga in the same place at the same time? http://bit.ly/9V05vY
• Did someone ask for a life-size Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle party van? ‘Cause, you know… there it is. http://bit.ly/dt1Jz9
• Could someone please explain this to me. Is that an Alien copping a feel? http://bit.ly/bIVyCC

Find out what’s on Clearance at ThinkGeek

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